


A Horse With No Name

by Roseheartwhitefox



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Acceptance, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, BoJack Horseman References, Conversations, Coping, Depression, Don't Examine This Too Closely, Empathy, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Fate & Destiny, Feel-good, Feels, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Grieving, Healing, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Inner Dialogue, Inspiration, Inspired by BoJack Horseman, Inspired by Music, Loneliness, Loss, Loss of Control, Love, Male Friendship, Men Crying, Music, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Real Life, References to Depression, Sadness, Self-Discovery, Shipping, Slice of Life, Songfic, Talking, Time's Arrow Neither Stands Still Nor Reverses, Timeline What Timeline, True Love, Understanding, WAFF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29467713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roseheartwhitefox/pseuds/Roseheartwhitefox
Summary: The story of what happened to Inuyasha after Kagome disappeared when the well closed for 3 years, heavily referencing the episode "The Old Sugarman Place" from "BoJack Horseman". I feel as if after everything that happened and Kagome disappeared, Inuyasha would need time to grieve the loss. This is that story. Deals with themes of depression, loneliness, and loss. Complete.Playlist for the songs featured in this story. Music helps tell a story sometimes just as much as words.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7r9W6fsX98&list=PLLZqlnoj0Q7AVoIawUeLpkyIKcqnAkjxD
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha
Comments: 4
Kudos: 5





	1. A Horse With No Name

_I miss you, Kagome._

_Everything's felt so pointless since you've been gone._

_I'm...not happy here. But leaving doesn't seem much better._

_I'm just...._

_...drifting_.

Inuyasha's life had fallen into a repetitive loop since that dreadful day when he had returned from the well without Kagome. Life went on, it seemed, for everyone else. Waking up. Doing chores. Slaying demons. Hauling goods. Collecting crops. Over. And over. And over. And over, again. Each day blurred into the next in his life.

His life without _her._

Miroku and Sango were a couple now, and were starting a life together. Shippo was off to become a full fledged kitsune. Everyone had a purpose to life now. But for him, it just seemed like the entire point of every day life just didn't exist anymore. 

_I think about the look on your face when I disappeared. And all the things I never said to you. If I had only said all the things I wanted to say...the things you needed to hear...maybe you'd still be here._

_With me..._

He thought about Kagome as he did chores during the day. As he helped Kaede collect herbs and make medicine. As he helped Miroku slay demons on the outskirts of town. As he lay awake at night in the dark, alone.

He thought about Kagome _all_ the time.

_I think about you...alot. I wonder if I'll ever see you again._

_I wonder what you're doing right now , and if you miss me...the way that I miss you. The way your family must have missed you all those times you were here with me...instead of them. I never realized it before, but you sacrificed a lot to be by my side. I never understood how strong you must have been before. _

_How selfish I was..._

Inuyasha sat on his tree branch a lot. Alone. Tonight, he sat alone again, watching the moon as it cast it's light across the landscape. He heard a noise below him, and saw the face Shippo as he shimmied up the tree. Although it was a familiar face, it brought him no comfort to see his old companion. And he felt terrible for it.

"Hey, Inuyasha," Shippo said softly, "What're you doing up here?" he asked, the care evident in his voice.

"Oh, you know..." said Inuyasha with heavy sarcasm, trying to pretend he wasn't feeling as nearly terrible as he was. "Sitting in a tree in the middle of the night, staring unblinkingly at the moon...just regular stuff."

There was silence between them for a moment before Shippo spoke, his voice cutting the quiet air.

"Are you thinking about her?"

Inuyasha didn't respond. He simply stared into the horizon, his expression blank.

"Thought so," said Shippo with a sigh. He had seen that look on Inuyasha's face a hundred times. "Me too. I miss her. Miroku and Sango too."

Inuyasha just signed heavily, resting his face on his hands as he sat with Shippo in silence.

It was hard not to envy Miroku and Sango. They were his friends, and he cared deeply for them. But seeing them together, so happy and content...having the life together he had wanted with Kikyo and Kagome only increased the pain of loss he had felt since the well had closed.

"But I know you miss her the most," said Shippo, reaching a kind hand to touch Inuyasha's shoulder. "It must be hard."

"It is." said Inuyasha flatly.

"Do you think she's happy?" asked Shippo.

"I hope so." replied Inuyasha quietly.

"It's just...I'm worried about you," said Shippo, his voice full of care, "We all are. You know we're always here for you, right?"

"Yeah," replied Inuyasha without emotion. "I know." 

"Well...good-night, Inuyasha," said Shippo with one last, long look at the forlorn Inuyasha. "I'll see you later."

"Yeah." replied Inuyasha, his voice far off and forlorn. And so it happened this way night after night. And his sadness only grew.

* * *

More and more these days, Inuyasha wandered on his own rather than staying in the company of his friends or the villagers. Fighting off youkai didn't thrill him anymore. Nothing did. As he wandered, he thought only of Kagome, and the reality of the fact he'd probably never see her again. He had lost Kikyo, the woman he loved. Then, when love had found him again, he had lost Kagome. The pain of that fact was almost too much to bear.

Many times, Inuyasha stood at the edge of a precipice overlooking a large gorge. It would be so easy just to end it all. And it was the only small comfort he felt these days.

Kikyo was gone forever, and Kagome was never coming back. The empty feeling overtook his entire being. He felt numb, and lifeless. He could see his entire life as if he had already lived it. A life without the woman he loved was a life worth nothing at all. The only thing stopping him was knowing that, if in the impossible event Kagome _did_ come back, he couldn't stand the thought of her finding out he was gone. And so, he continued to exist. He was alive, but he felt as if he wasn't living anymore. Nothing made him happy anymore. Not even the company of his friends was enough to soothe his soul.

_Nothing._

And so it was one day, without even thinking clearly about it, Inuyasha pulled himself onto a white mare with a red-brown mane, and rode off. To nowhere, really. He just wanted to go. _Anywhere._ It didn't matter. He just couldn't stay here anymore. Not without Kagome. He didn't even say goodbye to anyone. Didn't want to explain the unbearable sadness in his heart, and the emptiness of existence. The numbness, and complete lack of caring for his life, or anyone in it anymore. He didn't even look back.

And so, he rode.

* * *

_On the first part of the journey I was looking at all the life._

_There were plants and birds And rocks and things._

_There was sand and hills and rings._

Inuyasha simply rode. There was no particular destination in mind. He just _went_. Wherever he wound up, is where he wound up. It didn't matter. His heart felt numb, and empty. He yearned for Kagome, and had lost all hope that she'd ever come back to him. It was impossible. His mind went blank, giving in to the rhythmic galloping of the horse beneath him. On and on they went, stopping only to sleep. The landscape changed around him as he rode, and yet it almost didn't even register in his mind. 

_The first thing I met Was a fly with a buzz._

_And the sky with no clouds._

_The heat was hot And the ground was dry._

_But the air was full of sound_

Inuyasha would stop for the night and lay under the blanket of stars. He thought about Kikyo. And Kagome. How he had lost both of them, and was alone again. He had fallen in love, but was too much of a coward to ever admit his true feelings. And now he'd never have the chance to tell the woman he loved how much he loved her. And it only made him feel more numb.

The stars illuminated the sky as far as the eye could see, with a shooting star passing by sometimes. He remembered the many nights he would watch those stars with Kagome, and how they reflected in her beautiful eyes in wonder. Oh, how she loved the night sky, and how he wished that the shooting star could grant his deepest desire the way Kagome said that it could. Kagome had always been there for him, whenever and wherever, no matter what. He'd taken it for granted, because she was _always_ there. Now that she wasn't, he felt barren and empty.

As he stared into the heavens, he wondered if Kagome could see those very same stars. But his heart sank when he remembered the lights in the city where Kagome lived, and that the stars did not appear in her sky.

Even in his dreams, he thought only of Kikyo, and of Kagome. Dreams of her appearing to him again, only to awaken to loneliness once more. He dreamed of what was, and dreamed of what might have been.

And so, he rode.

_You see I've been through the desert On a horse with no name._

_It felt good to be out of the rain._

_In the desert You can't remember your name._

_'Cause there ain't no one For to give you no pain._

_La la, la la la la la, la la la, la la..._

He knew Miroku, Sango, and Shippo were probably looking for him. And at the same time, he didn't really care. He didn't care about anything, or anyone any more. Not even his friends. He rode the horse onward and onward, over the landscape to nowhere in particular, lost in thoughts as he succumbed to the loss of his love. Over the mountains, the arid plains, to the sea and beyond - he just _went_. And kept going, onward, and onward. 

_After two days in the desert sun._

_My skin began to turn red._

_After three days in the desert fun I was looking at a riverbed._

_And the story it told Of a river that flowed._

_Made me sad to think it was dead._

Inuyasha sat in silence as the sun dipped over the horizon as night came yet again, as he did every night as the wind gently blew through his hair. The view was different every time, and yet he felt nothing at it's beauty. He longed for Kagome to be by his side, but she wasn't there. Would never be there. How long had he been wandering? How many times had he turned human during the new moon? He realized he had no clue. And he didn't really care about it, either. 

The summer began to end, and the trees exploded into brilliant color. Yet Inuyasha barely noticed.

And so time continued on, and Inuyasha wandered across the land. Fall was turning to winter, yet Inuyasha didn't notice. There was nothing worth noticing, and no place worth being. Not without Kagome. And so, he rode on.

_You see, I've been through the desert On a horse with no name._

_It felt good to be out of the rain._

_In the desert You can't remember your name._

_'Cause there ain't no one For to give you no pain._

_La, la, la, la, la, la, la la la, la la..._

One day, Inuyasha rode over a hillside that looked over a small village. It didn't particularly matter to him at first, until he realized that this was, in fact, the village he had lived with his mother many years ago. It felt like a far off, almost imaginary memory. He wondered if the house they had lived in was still there. 

Inuyasha led the horse by it's rope into the small village, gazing at this place from his childhood. He was surprised at how much he actually remembered about this place. There was hardly a soul around, however, as the cold breath of winter's wind blew through the trees. He realized that most people here had probably settled into their winter homes. This valley was particularly brutal during the cold.

Then, he saw it. An old house. But to Inuyasha, he'd have recognized it anywhere. Inuyasha had lived with his mother in that house. It was where his first memories took place. Despite how long it had been since her passing, Inuyasha longed for his mother. Until Kikyo, Kagome, and his other friends, she was the only one who had shown him any kind of compassion or love. The house was falling apart, but the sight of it was still incredibly familiar. It was as if he was transported back in time to his childhood days. He stood in front of the old place, and it was as if he half expected his mother to come out the door to greet him, despite how ridiculous it sounded.

_After nine days, I let the horse run free_   
_'Cause the desert had turned to sea_   
_There were plants and birds and rocks and things_   
_There was sand and hills and rings_

Up close, it was evident that no one had lived here since his mother had died. The place didn't even look livable anymore. Yet it was still hauntingly familiar. Seeing the home of his mother's memories falling apart bothered Inuyasha. It was the first time he had felt anything besides sadness and loneliness in a very long time. Although he knew it seemed absolutely stupid, Inuyasha decided upon himself that he would repair the old house in honor of his mother. After all, it's not like he had anything, or anyone to go back to. Might as well waste time here, doing something else besides wandering. However, supplies would be needed, and as of right now, he had nothing.

After gathering wood and other materials from the forest and the local shop in town, Inuyasha headed back to the collapsing house. He fed and watered the horse before stepping up onto the porch of the dilapidated building with an armful of supplies. The front door was lopsided and jammed, and took incredible force to pry open. It probably hadn't been touched in decades. After a considerable shove, the door collapsed off the frame, landing with a thud, and the doorframe wood began to splinter.

_"Boy!"_ came the shout of a voice across the yard.

Inuyasha turned his head as he heard the old man in the house nearby shouting.

_" Hey, boy!_ Is any of that to fix the door?" the old man spat.

Inuyasha scowled at the tone. The old man's audacity simply aggravated him. "What do you care? _I_ don't."

The old man spat right back. "Well you _should,_ boy! And if it were up to me, that old house would've been torn down years ago. Don't tell me you intend to try and salvage that garbage heap?"

"What's it matter to you, old timer?" Inuyasha snapped. This guy was really starting to piss him off.

"Time's arrow neither stands still nor reverses. It merely marches forward." said the man poignantly. 

"What the hell are you talking about you old fart?" Inuyasha snapped back again. This bastard had _some_ nerve. 

The old man spit on the ground forcefully before responding. "That place is beyond anyone's help now. It's a blight on the neighborhood. And that broken door is the cherry on the top of the shit sandwich."

"What kind of a sandwich has cherries on top?" Inuyasha shouted in annoyance.

"A shitty one. How about fixing your door instead of my metaphor?"

_"_ _Ow!_ "Inuyasha shouted as a piece of wood fell from the porch ceiling and hit him smack on the head. The old man cackled, and Inuyasha growled in anger before disappearing into the delipidated house.

_The ocean is a desert with it's life underground_   
_And a perfect disguise above_   
_Under the cities lies a heart made of ground_   
_But the humans will give no love_

It was strange, being inside the childhood home of he and his mother. Although the place was incredibly old and essentially falling down, Inuyasha still recognized the walls, the doorframes, and windows, despite being broken. It was almost as if he could see ghostly images of his childhood in that house - remembering his mother holding him close and singing, or tucking him into bed at night. To anyone else, this place was just a shack -but not to Inuyasha. It was the place his mother had lived and died so many years ago. His mother- the only person who showed him unconditional love until Kikyo and Kagome. Inuyasha realized he didn't even have a picture of Izayoi. She existed only in his memory. His mother _deserved_ to be remembered, and perhaps repairing the place they had once called home would serve as some form of memorial at least. 

It was strange to have so many memories of his mother flooding back. Memories he hadn't even thought about in what felt like a lifetime. As he ran his hands along the old wood and familiar places of the house, he remembered his time here as if it had happened only yesterday.

At first, it was only Inuyasha and his mother. He stayed close to her, and remembered her warmth and kindness. She would tell Inuyasha stories and sing songs to help him sleep. So much of his life had been spent trying to cover up the fact that his mother was human, or to act like he didn't miss her. But that was a lie. It had always been a lie. And he knew it.

When Inuyasha was old enough to stray away from Izayoi, he found that there were other children with other mothers, too. But while other children were free to make friends at will, there were strange difficulties for Izayoi's son.

Usually, there was polite avoidance. A boy named Gobiso came out and said, “My mother told me I couldn’t play with you.” And such conversations only repeated with other children.

Therefore Inuyasha grew up thinking all children pretty much stayed only with their mother. It was a fiction that helped keep the hurt of rejection from stinging so badly. Still, despite all the difficulties he faced, Inuyasha was loved unconditionally by Izayoi.

But eventually Inuyasha wanted another boy to play with. He turned to a villager named Uzuri’s twin sons Togo and Kombi. Here it was Izayoi's turn to be apprehensive, for Togo and Kombi had a reputation for mischief, rather than actually being friends with Inuyasha for friendship's sake. Everyone knew that except, loyally, their mother. Still, though, Inuyasha was thrilled he had couple friends to play with. Though he was polite and soft-spoken, he put up with the bullying of the two boys, as he had no one else to play with as an alternative.

From an early age, the older Togo and Kombi were rough with Inuyasha, but he put up with it. He picked up bad habits that had to be patiently broken one by one with Izayoi's’s firm but gentle parenting. The only thing that jeopardized their friendship was the awful time Togo and Kombi told Inuyasha that he was born out of wedlock.

Inuyasha did not know what wedlock was. That’s when they told him his father was a savage youkai that skipped out on their mother. “Ask anyone.”

Inuyasha cried. Izayoi took him aside and explained to him in gentle terms what had happened. That she loved his father, married him, and that he had died protecting them, and loved them unconditionally - and always would.

That night she watched the skies for Toga's star. She wondered if he was watching over them now - she, and their beloved son, Inuyasha.

His first experience with death came when he was 7 years old. His mother developed a severe case of pneumonia, a condition that would have been survivable with treatment. Yet the village healer refused to help because Izayoi had a child fathered by a demon, reasoning which was unbeknownst to Inuyasha. He stayed by his mother's side, and her condition only worsened daily. Helplessly, Inuyasha watched her decline. Finally after a week of suffering, Izayoi died peacefully in her sleep.

After the death, public sympathy turned, and stubborn folk said, “Yes, it’s too bad. But she asked for it.”

Inuyasha was on his own now. He left that house, taking one look back longingly at the home he and his mother shared. From that day on, Inuyasha was alone. And he thought most certainly, that it would as such forever. 

_ You see I've been through the desert  
On a horse with no name  
It felt good to be out of the rain  
In the desert, you can remember your name  
'Cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain _

_ La la la, la la la la, la la la, la la... _

And so, Inuyasha got to work on the house, although he barely had a clue what he was doing. He could only mimic what he'd seen people throughout his life do. Hold a piece of wood, and hammer nails in. Aside from that, he was just going to figure it out as he went along. Although he hardly made any difference in the house despite trying.

After gathering supplies the next day, Inuyasha returned to see that the front door had been fixed back into place. He knew immediately it was the old man. He wasn't sure why exactly, but having that old geezer interfere with what was supposed to be _his_ project to distract him from _his_ misery was infuriating. Enraged, he ripped the door out of place again with ease and dumped it down on the porch when he heard the old man yelling at him.

_" Hey, _we got a saying round here boy!" the old man yelled. _"Put your damn door back on or you're gonna freeze to death, you dumbass!"_

"I'll put that door back on my own when I damned well feel like it, you old bastard!" Inuyasha spat.

"Fine then. Freeze to death. _That'll_ really show me." replied the old man flatly.

Inuyasha was about to snap back, but realized he didn't actually know what to call this guy besides 'old bastard'.

"Hey, what's your name, anyway? I want to know what to call you when I'm yelling at you to shut the hell up!"

"I'm called Ichiban. But people call me Buzz." said the man, matter-of-factly.

_" Buzz, _why don't you mind your goddamn business?" shouted Inuyasha.

"Why don't you just give up on that worthless old house?" Buzz retorted, but Inuyasha ignored him. "And you got a name too, don't you boy?"

"Inu-" but Inuyasha cut himself off. Perhaps an alias would be best in this situation as to not be recognized. "They call me... _uhh...Souta."_ Inuyasha said, remembering Kagome's brother's name.

"Well, _Souta,"_ said the old man taking a whiff of his pipe. "Guess you'll have to figure out a lost cause on your own. Cause' that house ain't worth squat."

Inuyasha snorted in annoyance before going inside to continue working.

* * *

Inuyasha hated to admit it, but the old geezer had a point about the house. It was in desperate need of repairs, and every other step was treacherous not knowing if a foot was going to snap through a floorboard or have something fall on his head. Not only that, but winter was settling into the valley, and the snow and cold would soon be upon him. Still, though, he really didn't have anything better to do, did he? Might as well waste time here.

The next day, Inuyasha returned from the forest, only to find that Buzz was watching him from the porch again.

"It's only ghosts here in the winter," said Buzz, smoking his pipe. "You'd be better off ditching that house and going somewhere more seasonable. If you had any lick of sense, that is, and I'm pretty sure you _don't."_

Inuyasha ignored him, only to find that the front door had been fixed back onto the frame.

_" What? Wait_ _!"_ Inuyasha exclaimed, turning toward Buzz, who was still watching him. _"_ _Hey,_ did you fix my door? That is a dick move, buddy!" In his anger, Inuyasha tore the door off the frame again, pounding his way into the house.

"What are you...are you _insane?_ _"_ replied Buzz. _"Honestly!_ What's _with_ you, boy? Winter's almost here, fool! You need all the help you can get!"

Inuyasha simply huffed as he turned away, shoving the broken door back into the frame behind him.

* * *

The next day upon returning from the forest with supplies after feeding the horse, Inuyasha growled as he saw that, yet again, his door was fixed back onto the frame.

_" What the_ _..."_ Inuyasha fumed for a moment, only to realize that Buzz was watching him from the porch, as usual.

_"_ _Hey!_ Stop fixing my door, _asshole!_ _"_ Inuyasha snapped as he pointed a clawed finger towards the old man. Enraged yet again, Inuyasha went to rip the door off, only to find it was much harder to remove it this time. "Why did you fix this so good?"

"If you keep breaking it, I'm gonna break _you_ _!"_ shouted Buzz.

_" Well,_ call me a mosaic because _I'm_ already broken!" Inuyasha spat.

"Mosaics aren't already broken, idiot! That's the whole point!" replied Buzz.

Inuyasha simply cursed under his breath, and slammed the door shut behind him.

* * *

That day, Inuyasha continued to try and fix the house. He had somehow managed to plaster a hole in the wall, as he had actually watched Kagome's grandfather do it... _once._ Although it seemed that every time he managed to  "fix" something, something _else_ became more broken. It was as if progress wasn't being made at all.

As Inuyasha hammered some boards crookedly to the floor, he was startled by the voice of Buzz, who was standing in the doorway.

"What the _hell?_ _"_ exclaimed the old man. "Do you even know how to... _anything? "_

Inuyasha was infuriated at the audacity of this guy. "I plastered this wall, didn't I?" he snapped placing a hand on the repaired hole, only to find that his hand went right through it, opening the hole again.

_" Uh...oh..._ _"_ Inuyasha trailed off with embarrassment.

"I believe something got plastered." Buzz cackled.

"The problem is I can't get the right supplies..." Inuyasha fumbled in his reply, "I can't get the...uhh...you know, that... _whatever_ to fix...the _thing?"_

_" Heh! _You're telling me! You don't know your socket from your pocket. Let me get my toolkit." replied Buzz.

Inuyasha sighed, admitting defeat. "Keh! Yeah, _fine,_ you can help, a little. If it means _so_ much to you, I will let you help me."

Buzz smiled, and returned with more tools than Inuyasha could have possibly known what to do with. Hell, he didn't even know what most of them _were._ Despite his annoyance, Buzz made more progress in an hour than he himself had made in almost a week. The man was a carpenter, and he knew his craft well.

"See boy," Buzz spoke as he repaired over some of the places Inuyasha had attempted. "You gotta line up the wood with the old stuff, and make new holes for the nails. That way it's nice and sturdy."

_ "Oh... _ _"_ Inuyasha replied. He was beginning to realize that he did, in fact, need help. And this man knew far more than he ever would. "I guess I just figured you had to put everything back exactly the way it was."

"You would think that, newbie. You don't even hammer the nails down straight! Everything you did here is a crooked mess!" said Buzz.

"Yeah, well, it's not exactly like I have much experience fixing houses! Do _you?"_ Inuyasha replied with a snark.

"I've been doing this stuff my whole life. When you get to be my age, you learn a lot. You will too, one day." Buzz laughed. And so, the two began to work on the house, and actual progress was made for the first time. And it was the first time he was able to actually do something to take his mind off of Kagome. Buzz essentially undid everything that Inuyasha had done, which wasn't really that difficult. 

"Yep, we gotta build this place back together from the ground up. Most of this wood is old and rotted. Gotta make sure we don't fall through the floor." Buzz said.

"I already got stuck plenty of times already. Watch your step, geezer." Inuyasha replied.

Buzz hammered the floorboards one by one, showing Inuyasha the exact method to do it right. Inuyasha tried his best to mimic his actions, and was a surprisingly quick learner, much to Buzz's surprise. 

"You're certainly picking this up faster than I thought you would, kid." said Buzz with a smile.

"Guess I'm just gifted, I suppose." Inuyasha replied saracastically.

They worked in relative silence for quite a while until Inuyasha spoke again.

"Hey, Buzz?" Inuyasha asked. 

"Yes, boy?" replied Buzz.

"Looks like you and me are the only ones around here. How come you don't go away for winter like everyone else?

"I don't leave. Okay?" Buzz replied firmly.

"But why can't you?" Inuyasha asked. "I mean, if I wasn't here you'd be all alone. You could probably tag along with someone else."

"I didn't say I _can't_ leave. I said I _don't_ leave." replied Buzz with annoyance. 

_"Keh,_ fine then. Though why you'd choose to stay here at your age all alone doesn't make much sense to me." said Inuyasha, and the two began to work again.

Buzz helped Inuyasha repair a large portion of the floor that day, in addition to several holes in the wall. He couldn't help but think that despite the fact that Buzz had said the house was a lost cause, it actually looked like headway was being made. The place was actually starting to look like a _real_ house rather than some kind of abandoned shack.

_"Yo_ _, Souta,"_ spoke Buzz when they had stopped to take a break. _"Hey, Souta!"_ he shouted when Inuyasha didn't respond.

Inuyasha almost choked, realized he'd forgotten to respond to the name he'd made up for himself. _"Uhh...yeah, Souta!_ That's me!"

Buzz eyed Inuyasha suspiciously before speaking. "What I was going to ask was if you were related anyone around here, or if you were just squattin' in this old house? Not that it matters, anyway. Hasn't got much use in use in the last 75 years, except for the termites."

_"Uhh, well..."_ Inuyasha replied, stumbling as he tried to think of some excuse. "I...used to know someone who lived here. I thought it would be nice to come back."

"Yes, well..." Buzz mused. "No one's lived here in ages, boy. So not sure who you're thinking of. Last person that lived here died decades ago. Izayoi, I think. Nice woman. Had a son. Little hairy fella. Part monkey or somethin'."

Inuyasha grimaced a bit at being called 'little hairy fella'. But Buzz continued.

"Sweet kid, didn't say much but was a good egg. Looked a lot like you, actually."

Inuyasha gulped nervously and was certain he'd been caught.

"Resemblance is striking, really. I'd bet my left leg you were him. But that can't possibly be, can it? That was over 70 years ago. He'd be an old man now, and you're a spring chicken," laughed Buzz. "Time's arrow neither stands still nor reverses! It merely marches forward."

Inuyasha and Buzz continued to work on the house for the rest of the day. It amazed Inuyasha how far they had come in just a single day. Buzz invited him over for dinner, and though typically he'd have refused an offer, a full day's work made him ravenous for a hot meal. And he ate voraciously.

"Yep, hard day's work on a house will do that to ya," said Buzz with a chuckle. "Eat up all you want. I got plenty."

"Can't remember the last time I had a hot meal like this, to be honest," said Inuyasha. "Just pretty much eating whatever I could find."

"So you got family, boy?" Buzz asked as they continued to eat.

"I used to," Inuyasha replied solomnly, thinking of his mother, Kikyo, and Kagome. "There isn't any more of us. I'm the last of my line. Once I die, that'll be it, which is probably for the best."

"No more of you?" said Buzz. "Well, that's a real shame. You got anyone _special,_ then?" asked Buzz with a mischievous smirk. "Strapping, handsome young fella like you must have _someone_ out there who's worryin' about him."

Inuyasha sighed. "I did. But she's gone now. I don't think I'll ever see her again."

Buzz paused for a moment, staring into his tea before replying. "Was it you or her?"

"Both of us, I think," Inuyasha replied woefully, realizing this was the first time he had actually talked to anyone about Kagome. "We...we were from different worlds. I guess it just couldn't work out."

"Ah, don't fret, youngin'," laughed Buzz, "She'll come around, this woman. They tend to do that, ya know? The good ones, anyway. You'll see."

Inuyasha smiled. "I'm hoping for that. Maybe you're right. I sure hope so." 

"If she's the one, she'll come back," replied Buzz. "Like a bad fart, the ones that matter will always come back to ya."

Inuyasha and Buzz laughed together for a moment, and the feeling was very freeing. It was the first time he had laughed in...well, he didn't even know how long. And it felt damn _good._

_"I knew you could laugh, boy!"_ cackled Buzz. "That's the reaction I was going for!"

Inuyasha waved to Buzz before heading back to the house. He'd never admit it, but for the first time since Kagome had disappeared, he didn't feel quite so alone.

* * *

Inuyasha and Buzz worked on the old house together every day. He actually looked forward to talking with the old man, and learning whatever he had to teach. Actually doing something productive helped distract him from how much he missed Kagome. It didn't stop it, of course, but it dulled the pain quite a lot. There was also an odd sense of comfort being in the house shared with his mother all those years ago. He missed her just as much as he missed Kagome. Making this old house come alive again gave him even a small sense of satisfaction.

"See this window? Gotta seal it good so the cold don't get in. These gaps just won't do. Here, use that stuff there to fill it in until you can't feel the wind anymore. That's when you know it's right." Buzz said as he showed Inuyasha how to fix the windows. 

"Gotta make sure this roof is nice and smooth, so the snow falls off and the rain don't get in," Buzz explained as he and Inuyasha were perched on the rooftop. "That's right, hammer just like that."

"How do you know how to do all this, anyway?" asked Inuyasha.

"Souta, my boy, I've lived a long time. This is stuff you gotta know. Sure will be helpful for you to know all this once that girl comes back," Buzz laughed. "That's why they call me Buzz, you know? I was always up around the windows fixin' somethin'. Like a fly. The name just stuck."

"You're about as annoying as one!" Inuyasha bantered. "Better watch out I don't smack you by accident!"

"Ha! Well you'd best watch out, or my hammer just might accidentily nail in your head!" Buzz snarked back. And so, the work continued.

"That's it, boy!" Buzz would coach encouragingly as he had Inuyasha start completing repairs under his guidance. "You'll be a master at this in no time!"

* * *

One day, Buzz and Inuyasha were repairing the wood on the side of the house. It was a tough job, as there were almost no pieces that were salvageable, and thus most had to be replaced. 

"Boy, old-timer, I've done a lot of crazy stuff in my life, but I gotta say that this repair stuff takes a lot out of you." Inuyasha said as he was sweating profusely, despite the fact that it was quietly snowing around them. Slaying demons was _easy_ compared to this!

"It's a craft few appreciate. Although you'll never think of it the same way again, now will ya?" Buzz laughed, "And it does get easier, boy. But you gotta do it every day. That's the hard part. Time's arrow neither stands still nor reverses! It merely marches forward."

"Well, sure looks a hell of a lot better now. This place actually looks like a house. Kind of like when me and my mo-" but Inuyasha cut himself off, realizing he almost broke his cover. "When...when I visited someone who used to live here, I mean."

Buzz eyed Inuyasha suspiciously, but shrugged and continued to hammer. As they got to some of the boards higher up, Inuyasha was able to climb up where Buzz could not reach, and with coaching below, applied the new pieces of wood almost as well as the carpenter himself would have.

"Good job, boy!" Buzz praised him, clapping. "You'll really impress that girl of yours when she comes back when she sees the house you're gonna build her!"

Inuyasha smiled at the statement. At the thought of building a house for him and Kagome. A _home._ The thought of that filled his heart with hope. A hope that he had been certain he'd never feel again.

"Say, boy," said Buzz mischievously. "This girl of yours, what's she look like, anyway? Sounds pretty dreamy from what you've told me so far."

_"Well..."_ Inuyasha replied thoughtfully as he mused. "She's got beautiful eyes...luminous, really. Kind, and full of laughter. And dark hair, like a raven. And she smells really-" Inuyasha coughed, cutting himself off, realizing how weird it must be to say that Kagome smelled good.

"She... _smells_ good?" Buzz cocked an eyebrow curiously.

Inuyasha was blushing profusely as he tried to correct himself. "Well, you _know!_ She uses all that...lady stuff. That stinky stuff that makes them smell good."

"Ah, yes. Women do like to make themselves smell good. Unlike us men, right? We walk into the room smelling like a pile of dog shit." Buzz replied with a deep laugh.

Inuyasha followed Buzz and laughed deeply himself. _Oh,_ how good it felt to laugh like this!

"She did used to tell me I was stinky a lot," Inuyasha chuckled. "Forced me to take a bath."

"Ah, those women like to wash away the natural odors with their sophisticated crap. Hard to say no to them, though. They have that way about them." laughed Buzz.

"They sure do." replied Inuyasha dreamily, thinking of Kagome.

"So what else?" asked Buzz with a mischevious glint in his eye. "Was she...ya know?" Buzz raised his eyebrows up and down suggestively. "Did she have a nice ass? Or a nice rack?"

Inuyasha lost his balance and planted head first onto the ground. He was blushing so profusely that Buzz thought poor Inuyasha's head might explode.

_"GAH!_ What kind of question is that? You're really just an old pervert, aren't you?" Inuyasha spat. 

Buzz simply laughed deeply and narrowed his eyes. "I may look old, but my heart is still young!" he chuckled. "Well then, _does_ she?"

Inuyasha twiddled his fingers together as he blushed before responding. "She...she had it _all._ She was the most beautiful _thing_ I've ever seen. Outside and inside."

"Ha! Thought so!" Buzz laughed. "Ah, youth is wasted on the young, isn't it? Well then, I suppose you should get back to work, _stud,_ if you wanna get this house done by the time your sweetie pie comes back!"

Inuyasha smiled and laughed again. "Honestly...it feels good to talk about Kagome. I haven't talked about her in so long."

"Makes it feel like she's still a part of your life, right?" said Buzz as his gazed into the distance longingly. "Sometimes it feels like that's all you got. We’re just two lonely people trying to hate ourselves a little less, ain't we?"

Inuyasha was shocked at Buzz's statement, and how true it was. How did this old man know that? It was as if he read his mind. And so, the two continued working until the evening. As Inuyasha lay in the darkness, he thought about Kagome again. Only this time, he thought of all the good times. And for the first time in a long time, thinking about her didn't make him feel so sad.

* * *

"Gotta sand this wood down, see?" said Buzz as he instructed Inuyasha. "It's important to remember for when you build your girl a house. Gotta make it smooth, so no one gets a splinter. Specially any youngins' you'll have running around." Buzz winked, and Inuyasha blushed.

_"Keh!"_ coughed Inuyasha. "Aren't we getting a little ahead of ourselves?" Although truthfully, Inuyasha really liked the feeling of having a family with Kagome. It filled him with warmth knowing that, perhaps one day, he'd be able to be the father he had always wished for in his life, with his beloved Kagome by his side. As continued to work beside Buzz, Inuyasha realized that the old man had never mentioned any children of his own, or anyone else in his life, for that matter. Perhaps he never took a wife. Inuyasha felt it best not to ask.

Inuyasha would sometimes bring meat to Buzz, and they'd always eat together. They'd stare into the heavens as the stars came out one by one. Sometimes they'd talk, and others they'd lay in silence.

"Bet your girl can see those stars," said Buzz dreamily. "And the moon. Ain't no place on this earth you can't see it."

Inuyasha averted his gaze, remembering that Kagome _couldn't_ see the stars like this in her world. But the moon could be seen no matter what. Yes...perhaps she could see the moon too, just like now. And it made him feel a little better.

* * *

And so, the cold days of winter melted into the warmer days of spring. And every day, Inuyasha and Buzz fixed the house, enjoying each other's company and endless conversation. He didn't even have to worry about his monthly human transformation during the new moon, since he only worked with Buzz on the house during the daytime. The old building looked completely unrecognizable from before. It gave Inuyasha far more satisfaction than he could have ever anticipated. He and Buzz would talk about all kinds of things, but a lot of the time they talked about Kagome. 

"So this girl of yours," asked Buzz as they painted the walls of the bedroom one day, "Sounds like you two spent quite a lot of time getting to know each other."

"Honestly, I'm amazed she put up with me as long as she did," Inuyasha replied. "She got to know me. The _real_ me. I felt comfortable around her. Like I could be myself. I just spent so much of my life on my own. Thought I would always be that way. Like, that if I let my guard down too much, everybody's gonna see the real me. Now, I spend a lot of time with the real me, and thought for sure nobody's gonna love that guy."

"Well I like you just fine," chuckled Buzz, "Sometimes I think we're our own worst enemy in this world. Thinkin' we don't deserve love. Or to be happy."

"It was different with _her_ ," Inuyasha replied, thinking of Kikyo and Kagome, "She liked me just as I was. And that meant more to me than I can ever explain."

It felt _good_ to talk about Kagome. It also felt good to take his mind off of her, and just engross himself in the work of fixing the house, and enjoying the company of another person.

Despite this, his mind always wandered back to Kagome. And every night before falling asleep, he longed for her, and wondered if she perhaps felt the same.

* * *

One night, Inuyasha had cooked some fresh venison over a fire and decided to bring some to Buzz. He headed into Buzz's house, but he wasn't in sight.

_"Yo, Buzz!"_ Inuyasha shouted. "Got some nice hot venison! Old geezer like you could use something nutritious!"

Inuyasha poked his head around the house, but Buzz wasn't around. He then found himself in the bedroom, and was surprised to realize he hadn't seen any part of Buzz's house except for the dining area. The bedroom surprised him, however. For even though it was clear that Buzz lived alone, while looking around the bedroom, it looked as if a woman was living here. Everything looked as if two people occupied the room - a woman's clothing draped over the chair, her shoes on the floor, and her cosmetics on the side table. Yet there was no scent of anyone in here except for Buzz himself. Inuyasha then noticed a painting on the wall of a man and a woman. To his surprise, the young man in the image was _Buzz_ himself, next to a very pretty woman. They looked incredibly happy in the moment the painting was done. Inuyasha had never heard Buzz talk about anyone in his life before. 

Inuyasha wandered back into the living room when Buzz entered the house, smiling upon seeing his friend. 

"Hey geezer, thought you could use a hot meal from me for once." Inuyasha smiled, placing the hot food on the table.

"Ah, venison!" exclaimed Buzz. "Haven't had wild game in ages. Care to sit with me?"

Inuyasha nodded as he sat with Buzz to enjoy the tasty meat. After, the two went out to lie on the soft grass under a blanket of stars as the spring peepers began their song into the darkness.

"House is almost done," Buzz sighed, "Was a lot of work. But can't say I didn't like doing it. Been a while since I did much of anything, to be honest."

"Sure has been for me too." replied Inuyasha.

"What'll you do when it's done, boy?" asked Buzz.  


"Guess I'll continue on my way. Not that I really have anywhere to go." sighed Inuyasha.

"Guess if you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there," Buzz sighed. "You could stay here, you know. I wouldn't mind the company." said Buzz.

"Why don't you come with me, Buzz?" asked Inuyasha. "You could travel a bit. Get out of here for a while."

"I told you, I don't leave." Buzz stated firmly.

"Why not?" probed Inuyasha. "You gonna just stay in this place the rest of your life and never see anything else again?"

"I told you!" Buzz snapped. "I _don't_ leave."

"I can't just leave you here all alone, old timer!" Inuyasha exclaimed. "I'd feel bad knowing that."

"Then why don't you stay?" asked Buzz. 

Inuyasha paused in his reply. "I don't know where I want to go anymore, really. I just wanted something to do, I guess. After that, I guess I'll just find something else."

"Why did you even come here, anyway?" asked Buzz. "You say you used to know someone who lived in that house, but no one's lived there in decades. I've lived here long enough to know ain't nobody else been in that house. Friends aren't supposed to hide anything from each other, boy. You wanna tell me why you _really_ came here, _Inuyasha_?"

"So you figured it out, huh?" replied Inuyasha.

"Course I did, boy. The more I thought about it, I realized that Izayoi's boy must have been a hanyou. The resemblance ain't no coincidence. Though how you haven't aged is beyond me . So tell me, what are you actually doing here?"

Inuyasha sighed. "It's a long story."

_"I'm old!"_ Buzz replied with a laugh. "I _like_ long stories!"

And so, Inuyasha told Buzz the story of how he came to be there. Of his life after the death of Izayoi. Of meeting and falling in love with Kikyo, and Naraku's cruel plot, and the arrow pinning him to the tree for 50 years. Of meeting Kikyo's reincarnation, Kagome, and the adventures they went on together, and the friends they made. Inuyasha found that once he started the tale, he couldn't stop himself from talking. It was the first time he had talked about everything that had happened, to anyone else. Buzz simply listened in silence, allowing Inuyasha to tell his story. The story of his friends, their trials and tribulations, and of the two women he had loved, and lost. 

"And then," Inuyasha said, as he approached the end of his tale, "Kagome went back through the well. Only this time, she couldn't come back. I haven't seen her since."

"That must have been hard, boy." replied Buzz kindly.

"I lost Kikyo, and then as if that wasn't bad enough, I lost Kagome too," Inuyasha found himself choking on his words. "I couldn't handle it anymore. So I just ran away, and wandered, not really knowing where to go and what to do. Then, I came here."

Inuyasha and Buzz lay in silence before one of them spoke.

"Well," said Buzz, "Maybe the words of an old geezer like me don't mean much. But sounds like the love you had with that woman was as real and deep as any out there."

_"Eh?"_ replied Inuyasha with slight confusion. "You talk about the two of them as if they are one person. Kagome and Kikyo are different people."

"Well, think about it, boy!" said Buzz. "You loved Kikyo, but she died. Then, her soul was reincarnated into Kagome, who found you again. Only a love that was destiny could have done something like that. Even in another life, her soul managed to find you again. That's the strongest love I can imagine."

"Thing was, Kikyo was brought back to life...a half life, really. I couldn't protect her, and she died in my arms. It was my fault." replied Inuyasha, rubbing a tear from his eye in the dark.

"It was _not_ your fault, boy!" snapped Buzz. 

"And now Kagome is gone, probably forever..." Inuyasha choked as he allowed, for the first time, the tears to come that he had held back so long. "I took her for granted. I never said the things I wanted to say. The things she needed to hear."

Buzz reached out a comforting hand to grasp Inuyasha's as he replied. "There there, boy. It's not at all the way you think it is!"

"What are you talking about, geezer?" Inuyasha replied.

"Kikyo and Kagome shared the same soul. Kagome embodies all of the love you had for Kikyo. Her soul was set free to rejoin the reincarnation. Your love for Kikyo and for Kagome is one and the same. To find each other again, even in another lifetime! That's the strongest love there is. And I know for sure that a love like that will find you again. Kikyo's love for you will find it's way back to you. _Kagome_ will find her way back to you. Because that love transcends time. Even an old geezer like me knows that ain't something you find every day."

"I just...I think about how much _shit_ I put her through. How much of an asshole I was when she was nothing but kind sometimes. I should have done things differently. Should have treated her the way she deserved to be treated."

"She loved you," replied Buzz. "I know she did. Through all of that, she stayed by your side. That's how I know she'll be back. She's thinking of you right now, I'm certain!"

Then, to Inuyasha's surprise, Buzz began to quietly sing to himself.

_" I will always think of you._

_I see your face When each day's through._

_And days go past. Oh, so fast._

_But memories, they last._

_Summer, winter, year by year. Year by year I'll hear this song Inside my ear._

_Try to restart. That'd be smart._

_But thoughts of you Haunt my heart._

_No, I don't want to be alone now._

_Just biding my time I need somebody dearly._

_And darling, you'd be sublime._

_Spring and autumn, up and down._

_Up and down I keep trying to escape this town. And I just might I'll take flight._

_Maybe tomorrow, not tonight._

_I will always think of you."_

There was a moment of silence before Buzz spoke again. "That was our song - me and Kanna. My wife. Gods, I loved that woman..."

"I...I saw in your bedroom. It looked like a woman lived there. But there was no smell of one." Inuyasha replied.

"She died," Buzz stated. "Years ago."

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. It's alright." said Inuyasha.

"You were honest with me, boy. Now it's my turn to tell you the truth," replied Buzz with a deep sigh. "We were traveling together. Attacked by bandits. Knocked me out cold. All just to steal a small amount of gold we had, not even enough to buy a decent horse. When I awoke, I realized I was alive, but Kanna..." Buzz trailed off, choking on his tears. "She was gone"  


"I'm sorry," Inuyasha replied, reaching out a comforting hand to Buzz. "That's horrible. You didn't deserve something like that to happen to you."

"That isn't even the most terrible thing about it!" Buzz sobbed. "Oh, Kanna...she was the love of my life. How I took her for granted all those years together. I wish I had a chance to thank her for such a wonderful life, and tell her how much I appreciated her. But now I'll never get that chance. Life is nothin' but a series of missed opportunities. And you have to live the rest of your life knowing you'll never have that chance."

"I'm sure she knew," replied Inuyasha kindly. "It sounds like she really loved you, Buzz."

"All those years gone by, and I think...why didn't they kill me, too? I don't want to live!" Buzz sighed, holding his face in his hands. "Why didn't they kill me, instead of leaving me alone without Kanna?"

_"I..."_ Inuyasha trailed off. "I didn't know any of this, Buzz. I'm sorry for how...how I treated you when we first met. I didn't know." said Inuyasha sadly.

"How could you have known, boy? Talking to you, and helping you with that house...it's the most productive thing I've done since Kanna died. I'm grateful to our bantering conversations. It's the most alive I've felt in years." replied Buzz. 

"So that's...that's why you haven't left?" asked Inuyasha.

"I don't want to go anywhere ever again. Not without Kanna. I stay here, in our home we had together. It's the only way I feel like she's still a part of my life." Buzz replied.

"Still, though..." Inuyasha said, "I don't think she'd have wanted you to hide yourself away like this."

"And I don't think Kikyo and Kagome would have liked to see you so lost and miserable." replied Buzz.

"I know," sighed Inuyasha. "I wish I had told her how much I loved her when she was around me. Gods, we had so many chances, and I didn't do it. I took her for granted, and now I can't tell her how much I loved her. How much she meant to me. Now that I want to do it, she's gone."

"The universe is a cruel bitch, ain't she?" said Buzz. "Either you don't know what you want, but it's right in front of you, or you know what you want, and it's gone."

"You got that right." replied Inuyasha.

"It's a hard feeling, grieving like this. You can't be with people, and you can't be alone," said Buzz. "Time's arrow neither stands still nor reverses. It merely marches forward. And sometimes that's the biggest fucking bitch of them all." Buzz sighed.

"Yeah," sighed Inuyasha. "I didn't even want to be around my friends. The ones I told you about. They probably wonder what happened to me. I never even said goodbye."

"I'm sure they figured it out, and they understand," replied Buzz. "So you think you'll ever go back, then?"

"I don't belong there," replied Inuyasha as a tear fell from his eye. "I don't belong anywhere. Not without _her."_

"Well, you can stay here as long as you want, boy. And if I wake up one day and you're gone, I'll understand. You just do what you gotta do."

"Thanks, old-timer. I needed to hear that. That someone actually gets it." replied Inuyasha. 

"Believe me, if not _me,_ then no one," Buzz replied.

"I guess it's true what they say," Inuyasha said. "Life's a bitch and then you die."

_"No, boy,"_ replied Buzz, "Life's a bitch, but you keep on living. I'd just forgotten for so long how to do that."

"I know how you feel," replied Inuyasha. "Sometimes...it's just so hard anyway. It doesn't get better, and it doesn't get easier. Missing Kagome is all I can think about. And the sadness prevents me from enjoying anything at all. How can I enjoy anything if she's gone?"

"Well, we both got a chance to do a little living again, didn't we boy?" said Buzz. "No matter how deep our grief, we got to live a little bit. It's been far too long."

"It's just hard...just remembering _how_ to live," said Inuyasha. "Feeling like this, you know? It's amazing to me that people wake up every morning and say: _'Yeah, another day, let's do it!'_ How do people do it? How did _I_ used to do it? I don't know how anymore."

"And you know what I think, boy? It does get a little easier. But you gotta do it every day. That's the hard part," replied Buzz "But it does get easier." They sat in silence, pausing for a moment.

"And you know what else, boy? I think all we have in this terrifying world are the connections we make. Maybe that's why it's so hard when we lose them," said Buzz. "And no matter where you go, you can't escape that sadness. You gotta deal with it head-on. Cause it don't go away."

"You're right," replied Inuyasha with a deep sigh. "Absolutely."

The two lay in silence for while and stared at the stars glistening above as the warm spring breeze tickled the grass.

"Inuyasha?" asked Buzz in a whisper. "Could you stay here with me, just for tonight?"

"Of course, old timer." said Inuyasha. Buzz reached out a hand to Inuyasha, and to his surprise it was comforting to be near someone else like this, and talk in such a way. It was as if a great weight had been lifted from him. It wasn't long until they fell asleep.

* * *

The next morning, Inuyasha awoke to the sound of Buzz's voice again. He was sitting on the porch, humming to himself a tune as he stared into the distance.

_"I'll be seeing you  
In all the old familiar places  
That this heart of mine embraces  
All day through  
In that small café  
The park across the way  
The children's carousel  
The chestnut trees, the wishing well  
  
I'll be seeing you  
In every lovely summer's day  
In everything that's light and gay  
I'll always think of you that way  
I'll find you in the morning sun  
And when the night is new  
I'll be looking at the moon  
But I'll be seeing you  
  
I'll find you in the morning sun  
And when the night is new  
I'll be looking at the moon  
But I'll be seeing you"_  


Inuyasha had been completely caught up in the song. The words reminded him exactly of how he felt for Kagome. 

"What was that, old-timer?" asked Inuyasha. "That was pretty good."

"Oh, it was one Kanna loved," Buzz chuckled. "She loved music. Hardly a quiet moment with her around. Used to sing with me all the time. To be honest, I haven't sang in ages. Not till you were here."

"Well, I'm glad you're doing it again. Cause it's nice." Inuyasha said with a smile.

"You can sing that to your girl again, once she comes back," Buzz said with a smile before standing up from the table. "Well boy, might as well finish up that house. Can't leave a job half-finished, can we?" said Buzz. With a nod, Inuyasha set off to the house to finish the final repairs.

That night, Inuyasha thought of the words to Buzz's song. He gazed at the moon, and thought of Kagome. He was looking at the moon, but he was seeing her. And it gave him hope that one day, someday soon, perhaps she would be with him once again.

* * *

After a few more days of painting and hammering, the old house was finally back to it's former glory. Inuyasha and Buzz simply stood outside, admiring their work.

_"Wow!"_ said Inuyasha, "Who'd have known a hanyou and an old geezer could do something this great?"

"Ah, but there's one thing missing!" said Buzz with a laugh. He grabbed a paint brush and signed his name on the bottom step of the porch, and ushered Inuyasha to do the same.

"Okay, now, the house is absolutely, totally finished!" Buzz chuckled. "Gotta sign your work of art boy!"

And then, Buzz began to sing a fine tune as the sun gazed down on them.

_ "You can keep your starry night  
You can keep your moon glow  
For I can see two midnight suns  
So bright they"ll make a tear flow  
  
No summer night can warm your heart  
Without her I'm a shadow  
  
My southern lows are resting high  
With those eyes that I know _

_ Kagome with the eyes that sparkle!  
  
  
I've seen some sunsets  
And I've seen some rainbows  
I've seen some sunrises  
Kagome with the eyes that sparkle!  
_

_ One glance sends me soaring high  
And further than sparrow  
She burns right through my very bones  
Right through the very marrow  
  
Kagome with the eyes that sparkle! _

_ She sings a song with every glance  
And I'll love her till' the cows come home.  
  
I"ll make my home within her gaze  
And we will watch our love grow _

_ Kagome with the eyes that sparkle!" _

Buzz chuckled to himself as Inuyasha stared at him dreamily. "So, d'ya like it, boy?" Buzz said.

_"Did I?"_ laughed Inuyasha, "Buzz, did you write that song just for me?"

"Course!" replied Buzz happily, "I wrote you a song boy, so you can sing it to your girl when she comes back."

Inuyasha glowed at Buzz as he imagined singing the song to Kagome when she finally came home. Sure, he couldn't nearly hold a note the way Buzz did. But hell, he'd try!

"Here, boy. Take this paper with you, so you don't forget the song, and you can learn it," said Buzz, handing Inuyasha a slip of parchment. "Why, I haven't had music in me for so long. Being with you these past few months boy has given this old man life again." Buzz said.

Inuyasha smiled in appreciation. "I wish I could somehow pay you back for all your help."

"Don't sweat it," said Buzz, "I was happy to do it. Happier than I've been in...a long time."

"Not just that...for other things. Just talking with you, and all. It...it helped me," Inuyasha mused for a moment before replying. "Wait here, Buzz. I think I have something for _you_ this time."

Inuyasha went around the side of the house and led the horse towards Buzz with a smile, handing him the lead rope. "She's yours."

"Oh my boy, I can't possibly accept this. How will you get going where you're headed next?" Buzz asked, the appreciation glowing on his face. 

"I'm not wandering, anymore," replied Inuyasha. "I'm going home. To the well. To wait for Kagome to come back. To live my life until she comes back again."

"So you _do_ believe the words of an old geezer for once?" laughed Buzz as he stroked the horse's muzzle.

"They have a way of coming back, like you said," said Inuyasha, "Like an old fart," he laughed, "I'm going to keep going on believing it. And now you have an excuse to go somewhere. You can come visit me there. And I'll come visit you."

"I'm glad I met you, Inuyasha," said Buzz wiping away a tear. "Perhaps it's time for me to start living again, too. Kanna would have wanted that for me. But what about the house?"

"You keep it in good shape for me. So I can bring Kagome here when she comes back. I can trust you, can't I?" said Inuyasha with a smile.

"Of course I shall," replied Buzz reaching out a kind hand to Inuyasha's shoulder. "I look forward to that day. You can tell her all about this time we had together, and show her everything you learned! And I know it will come for you."

"I know," said Inuyasha, "And I'll keep on living until it does. And when Kagome comes back, I'm going to treat her like a goddamned queen."

"As you should! And for what it's worth, boy," said Buzz "I think she misses you, too. You're not half bad. She'll be happy when she sees you again."

Inuyasha smiled kindly at the response, embracing his friend in a final hug. "Good-bye, old-timer." And with that, he was gone.

It was only then that Buzz realized what Inuyasha had inscribed on the steps by his signature.

_ 'Buzz -All we have in this terrifying world are the connections we make. Thanks for everything -Inuyasha' _

And so, Inuyasha flew over the trees and the hills, back towards Kaede's village, his friends, and the well, where Kagome was sure to come back again someday. And he would be there to meet her when she did.

* * *

_"Old man, look at my life_   
_I'm a lot like you were_   
_Old man, look at my life_   
_I'm a lot like you were_

_Old man, look at my life_   
_Twenty four and there's so much more_   
_Live alone in a paradise_   
_That makes me think of two_

_Love lost, such a cost_   
_Give me things that don't get lost_   
_Like a coin that won't get tossed_   
_Rolling home to you_

_Old man, take a look at my life, I'm a lot like you_   
_I need someone to love me the whole day through_   
_Ah, one look in my eyes and you can tell that's true_

_Lullabies, look in your eyes_   
_Run around the same old town_   
_Doesn't mean that much to me_   
_To mean that much to you_

_I've been first and last_   
_Look at how the time goes past_   
_But I'm all alone at last_   
_Rolling home to you_

_Old man, take a look at my life, I'm a lot like you_   
_I need someone to love me the whole day through_   
_Ah, one look in my eyes and you can tell that's true_

_Old man, look at my life_  
 _I'm a lot like you were_  
 _Old man, look at my life_  
 _I'm a lot like you were" -'Old Man',_ Neil Young, 1972


	2. I Will Wait For You (Bonus Chapter!)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonus Chapter! Songfic to 'I Will Wait For You' by Connie Francis.

_If it takes forever I will wait for you  
For a thousand summers I will wait for you  
'Till you're back beside me, 'till I'm holding you  
'Till I hear you sigh here in my arms, I will wait for you_

Inuyasha had returned to the village after his journey this past winter. He had returned to wait for Kagome. It was good to see his friends again, and much to his surprise, they were understanding about his absence, and didn't press him too much to talk about it. He knew that one day, when he felt ready, he would talk about his time away. But for now, he held onto those memories, and of Buzz's words of wisdom that Kagome would come back. And so, time's arrow marched forward, as Buzz said. Yet every 3 days, Inuyasha returned to the well to look for Kagome, and waited there until the sun dipped below the horizon and stars blanketed the heavens.

He reminisced and looked through all the old pictures and items Kagome had left behind, faintly still carrying her faded scent. How he longed to transport himself into those images and hold Kagome and tell her how much he loved her. But he wouldn't give up hope. Kagome had never given up on him. And he would never give up on her.

_Anywhere you wander, anywhere you go  
Every day remember how I love you so  
In your heart believe what in my heart I know  
That forevermore I'll wait for you_

The seasons came and went. Miroku and Sango gave birth to a set of twins. Shippo had advanced quite far towards becoming a full-fledged fox demon. Inuyasha spent much time with his friends, and helped the villagers with his newfound building skills. No one had any clue where Inuyasha had learned such skilled craftsmanship, but it was extremely welcome to have help fixing the old buildings. He would often visit the old places Kagome liked, and enjoy the simple quiet and peace. And every 3 days, Inuyasha went to the well.

He would lie in the soft grass, staring at the clouds as the wind rolled them by, until the moon rose over the horizon and blanketed the trees with it's gentle ambiance, holding his favorite picture of Kagome close to his heart in the moonlight. A moon that, perhaps, like Buzz had said, could be seen anywhere. Maybe even where Kagome was. And so, he waited. 

_The clock will tick away the hours one by one  
And then the time will come when all the waiting's done  
The time when you return and find me here and run  
Straight to my waiting arms, I will wait for you._

Even during the new moon transformation, Inuyasha went to the well, sitting inside the hallow chamber as the stars twinkled above, Kagome's picture huddled in his arms. His mind wandered to the happy days with her. It wasn't hard to do, especially if a man had memories in his heart like Inuyasha had in his.

He lived a little bit every day, finding pleasures in the simple things - whether a warm fire, or a cool breeze - and he saw Kagome in all of it. He knew that somehow, some way, she was with him. And he kept on believing that one day, she would return.

The snows fell during the cold breath of winter, piling up enough that he would have to shake himself off. And he waited. The winds blew, and the rains came, and he still waited. Spring came as the forest came alive with life. Summer passed in the blink of an eye as the fall colors filled the trees. And still, he waited. Waited for _her_. Because she was worth waiting _for._ And he would never give up hope that she would return to him.

* * *

_If it takes forever I will wait for you  
For a thousand summers I will wait for you  
'Till you're here beside me, 'till I'm touching you  
And forevermore sharing our love_

And so, he still waited. And times arrow never stopped moving forward. And he waited. He held her picture for what felt like a thousand times. And he waited.

One day while sitting with Miroku's twins as they played with his ears, much to his annoyance, it _happened._ It took him completely off guard - so much so that he thought he must have been dreaming. But there was _no_ mistaking it. He'd have recognized that scent _anywhere._

_'This scent! There's no mistake!'_ Inuyasha thought to himself as he ran. It _had_ to be _her_. It _had_ to be _Kagome!_

He ran to the well, faster than he had ever ran in his life. His heart pounded, his entire body shook. So many times he had been to that well, and so many times she did not appear. But he _had_ to know. In his heart, he knew. _'This time...this time, for sure!'_

He ran to the well so fast that he almost fell in it himself. He looked down into the darkness. He stood there trembling, his heart pounding so fast it felt as if it would burst from his chest. He looked down into the dark well. He saw nothing, but he could smell Kagome's sweet, _wonderful_ scent. He didn't even think about it. He reached a hand into the well, and a hand reached back to grab him.

Then, just like that...she was there. 

He stared at her in disbelief. Afraid he was dreaming again, and would surely wake up alone. But he didn't. Kagome was here. She was _really_ here. For the first time in his life, words failed him. The relief in his saddened heart lifted immediately, and the feeling was the deepest sense of satisfaction he could have ever felt.

_"Inuyasha..."_ Kagome spoke with tears in her eyes. "I'm so sorry. Were you waiting here for me?"

Her voice was the most beautiful sound he had _ever_ heard. The feel of her hand in his felt like a dream come true. He didn't know what to say. So he said the first thing that he could possibly utter.

_"Kagome, you idiot,"_ he spoke, his voice wavering as he choked back tears. "What have you been doing all this time?"

Inuyasha deeply inhaled Kagome's scent as he held her in his arms, feeling her warmth against him, savoring the flowing emotions that flushed through his entire body. 

_"Kagome!"_ came the shout of Shippo, and Inuyasha turned around to see that his friends had picked up on Inuyasha's sudden departure. They looked just as happy to see Kagome as he did. For they loved her, too, as he did. 

"You made it back!" said Sango with a smile.

"It's been much too long, Kagome!" exclaimed Miroku. 

"Miroku, Sango, Shippo! It's good to see you!" Kagome said happily. 

But Inuyasha could only focus on the feeling of Kagome in his arms. He had waited so long for this moment, and it filled his heart with more joy than he thought it ever possibly could feel. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, burying his face in her raven hair, and he cried. And it didn't matter this time that anyone saw it.

_'She made it Buzz...'_ Inuyasha thought as he embraced Kagome so tightly he thought he could never let go. _'She came back...just like you said.'_ _  
_

_"I love you, Kagome..."_ Inuyasha whispered to Kagome through teardrops. 

"I love you too, Inuyasha." Kagome whispered back as she brought his lips down for a kiss. They walked hand in hand together back to the village, for what would be a far better day for Inuyasha than the last.

_'Till you're here beside me, 'till I'm touching you  
And forevermore I will wait for you'_

* * *

That night, Inuyasha lay with Kagome on the soft grass, curled against him under the starry heavens.

"I missed this," said Kagome as she nuzzled into Inuyasha's chest. "You, of course, but also the sky. I missed the stars. The city can't compare to life here."

Inuyasha smiled as he pulled Kagome closer. "I thought about you all the time, Kagome. There was never a day I didn't long for you to be with me."

"I thought about you, too," said Kagome tenderly as she gave him a kiss, "I was worried you forgot me."

"I could never forget _you_ , Kagome..." Inuyasha whispered as he nuzzled Kagome's hair. "Not even for a minute."

They lay together in silence for a while, enjoying the feeling of being together again. For Inuyasha, that was enough, and far more than he could have ever wanted.

"So I told you what I was up to all this time," said Kagome after a while, "About school, and everything else. What about you? Miroku and Sango said you went away for a while when I disappeared."

At that comment, Inuyasha remembered the song that Buzz had written for Kagome. The song he had spent so long memorizing for the day she came back. And that day was finally here, at last. And so, for the first time in his entire life, Inuyasha sang. His voice cracked a lot, despite his trying. But he had waited _so_ long for this moment, he hardly cared if he sounded like a chicken being hit with a shovel.

_"You can keep your starry night  
You can keep your moon glow  
For I can see two midnight suns  
So bright they'll make a tear flow  
No summer night can warm your heart  
Without her I'm a shadow  
  
My southern lows are resting high  
With those eyes that I know _

_ Kagome with the eyes that sparkle!"_

_"Inuyasha!"_ Kagome exclaimed as she clapped her hands cheerfully, "I didn't know you could sing!"

"Well, not _good,_ but I'm trying!" Inuyasha chuckled.

"Well, come on, then! Sing me the rest!" begged Kagome.

Inuyasha grinned back as squeezed Kagome's hand continuing the song.  
  
 _I've seen some sunsets_  
 _And I've seen some rainbows_  
 _I've seen some sunrises_  
 _Kagome with the eyes that sparkle!_  


_ One glance sends me soaring high  
And further than sparrow  
She burns right through my very bones  
Right through the very marrow  
  
Kagome with the eyes that sparkle! _

_ She sings a song with every glance  
And I'll love her till' the cows come home.  
  
I"ll make my home within her gaze  
And we will watch our love grow _

_ Kagome with the eyes that sparkle!"_

__

_"Inuyasha!"_ laughed Kagome deeply, "That was _wonderful!_ Did _you_ write that?"

_"Me? Ha!_ No, no way!" Inuyasha laughed as he kissed Kagome's hand, "Someone wrote it for me. To sing to you when I came home."

"You mean _you_ made a friend? By _yourself?"_ Kagome replied.

_"What?"_ replied Inuyasha sarcastically, "You think I can't make a friend on my own?"

"It's just that you're definitely _not_ the most personable. You don't exactly give a good first impression!" Kagome laughed.

"Well, can't really disagree with _that!"_ Inuyasha laughed. "And you're right - it started out that way. But once I got to know him, he really helped me out when I needed someone."

"Well you _are_ quite charming once you get past the gruff," Kagome chuckled as she kissed Inuyasha's cheek. "I look forward to meeting him."

And so, after Kagome had a chance to settle in, they set out on the journey towards the village where he had lived with his mother. Now that it was summer, many of the villagers had returned from the winter, and so the town was full of life. Inuyasha led Kagome to the house that he had lived in as a child. The house he had spent several months fixing, where he had met Buzz, after wandering so aimlessly after Kagome had disappeared.

_"Oh, Inyuasha!"_ exclaimed Kagome as she admired the house. "I can't believe you fixed this place up! It looks so nice!"

"I didn't do it alone," Inuyasha smiled as he kissed the top of her head, scanning across the way to the neighbor's house. Just then, he saw him coming out the door of his home. _Buzz._

"Kagome," said Inuyasha, "I have someone I want you to meet." 

And with that, Buzz smiled as Inuyasha and Kagome came to greet him.

_"Oh, my boy!"_ exclaimed Buzz, "Your girl! Please, tell me that's her!"

Inuyasha's heart almost burst when Buzz called Kagome _his_ girl. Oh, what a wonderful feeling!

_"It is,"_ chuckled Inuyasha, "She came back, just like you said. Kagome, this...this is Buzz."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," said Kagome politely. "You must be the friend Inuyasha was telling me about."

_"Indeed,"_ replied Buzz with a glowing smile. "We'll have to tell you all about our time together here. But first, boy, I want to know all about how the lovely Kagome found her way back."

Kagome blushed a little upon hearing that the old man knew her name. "Well, it's a long story." Kagome said.

_"I'm old!"_ Buzz cackled. "I _like_ long stories!"

And with that, they all entered the house. 


End file.
